Tuesday, July 31, 2007
new blog...
I'm going to keep this blog focused on poker & life, life in poker, poker in life, life, poker, and everything... if you like prose / fiction / semi-fiction please visit my new blog!
Monday, July 30, 2007
sick
So I bagged the $24K deep stack tourny tonight... why? I dunno... I won my token yesterday afternoon, and when it came time to sign up today, I just... I decided I wasn't ready. I'm such a dork sometimes....
Instead, I got to mutter the word "sick" way too many times... I played some sit n go's, and saw some of the most horrifying suck outs, re-suck outs, 2-outer rivers, runner-runner flushes, runner runner boats, and other god awful beats. Sundays must be the day the Tilt tech crew says, "Hey, let's make sure that whoever gets all their money in BAD wins today!"
Sickest example: I'm in a heads-up sit n go (never played them before today; they're good for me I think as I pretty much suck heads up), I've been playing uber-aggressive and have about 2300. I pick up rockets in the BB and raise 5 x's BB after the dude limps, which he calls. Flop: rags (5 8 2 rainbow), I bet the pot, and dude moves all in. ?! OK, fine - call... he tables.... 2 3s!!! The damn river brings a freakin' 3. Upside of this is I climbed back and won the damn thing (serves him right for tryin' to push me out with bottom pair THREE KICKER!).
2nd sickest: in an 18-seater, down to the last 6, I get it all in with aces vs AK; 2 kings on the flop cripple me. 3rd sickest: very next hand I pick up AQs and shove, same dude that just cracked my aces calls -- he's got aces. And yes, they hold up this time.
Sick. Usually tough to tilt me for longer than a minute, but I was on serious tilt after this. I decided to close up tilt for the night before I spewed cash every which way.
Instead, I got to mutter the word "sick" way too many times... I played some sit n go's, and saw some of the most horrifying suck outs, re-suck outs, 2-outer rivers, runner-runner flushes, runner runner boats, and other god awful beats. Sundays must be the day the Tilt tech crew says, "Hey, let's make sure that whoever gets all their money in BAD wins today!"
Sickest example: I'm in a heads-up sit n go (never played them before today; they're good for me I think as I pretty much suck heads up), I've been playing uber-aggressive and have about 2300. I pick up rockets in the BB and raise 5 x's BB after the dude limps, which he calls. Flop: rags (5 8 2 rainbow), I bet the pot, and dude moves all in. ?! OK, fine - call... he tables.... 2 3s!!! The damn river brings a freakin' 3. Upside of this is I climbed back and won the damn thing (serves him right for tryin' to push me out with bottom pair THREE KICKER!).
2nd sickest: in an 18-seater, down to the last 6, I get it all in with aces vs AK; 2 kings on the flop cripple me. 3rd sickest: very next hand I pick up AQs and shove, same dude that just cracked my aces calls -- he's got aces. And yes, they hold up this time.
Sick. Usually tough to tilt me for longer than a minute, but I was on serious tilt after this. I decided to close up tilt for the night before I spewed cash every which way.
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Rollin' rollin' rollin'....
I was privileged to play against both my favorite and my scariest types of opponents this evening: the perpetual bluffer, and the calling stations. Of the 6-handed table, we had 2 perpetual bluffers, and one calling station. One guy I had no way to get an idea about, as I busted him on the 3rd hand when I turned Broadway to his 2 pair (note to self: that's why it's a bad idea to play Q10o OOP), and I don't remember the other one.
Head's up started dead-even, and Villain caught some big cards, and picked off 2 of my bluffs with his bottom pair, and 2nd pair: I file these tendencies away and remember to bet my monsters in the same way.
This hand turned out to be the turning point of the match:
Seat 1: Villain (5,340)
Seat 5: HERO (3,660)
HERO posts the small blind of 80
Villain posts the big blind of 160
The button is in seat #5
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to HERO [Ad Ks]
HERO raises to 400
Villain calls 240
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to HERO [Ad Ks]
HERO raises to 400
Villain calls 240
*** FLOP *** [4c 4s 4h]
Now, in the past boards like this have scared me; especially at a passive 5-to-the-flop STT, someone may very well have the 4. With only 2 people in, MUCH less likely. I still rate to have the best hand; he may have a pair, but I kinda don't think so (and no, his preflop call doesn't mean squat: he's called similar preflop raises with junk like 105o and taken a pot when he paired his 5):
Villain checks
HERO bets 800
Villain calls 800
Check/call: interesting. OK, he's probably got an ace, assuming a split pot. My guess is he would have raised with a pair in hand.
*** TURN *** [4c 4s 4h] [Qd]
Unless he has a Q, this is a good card for me: if He does have an ace, he's almost certainly thinking this is at worst for him a split pot, 444AQ.
Villain checks
Either he's slow-playing a 4 or a Q, or this is my pot. I don't think slow-playing is big in his play book, so I'm near positive I'm ahead. If he's got the 4, then so be it, and good for him.
HERO bets 2,460, and is all in
Villain calls 2,460
HERO shows [Ad Ks]
Villain shows [Ac 5c]
*** RIVER *** [4c 4s 4h Qd] [6c]
HERO shows three of a kind, Fours
Villain shows three of a kind, Fours
HERO wins the pot (7,320) with three of a kind, Fours
This puts the chip counts here:
Seat 1: Villain (1,680)
Seat 5: HERO (7,320)
That was a bit of an odd hand; with 3 of a kind on the board, the chance that he had the case 4 was low - which was probably the reason he was calling me down too. Some may think that was a crazy move pushing all-in without a pair, but by his betting I was rather sure I was ahead.
A few hands later, I got it all in on the turn when I had top pair / good kicker / 2nd nut flush draw - and he called with 72o that paired his 7 on the flop (he had, btw, called a large preflop raise with this too). I love it!
Thursday, July 26, 2007
The Commute
I got to the bus stop earlier than usual. I normally work from home a bit in the morning, and then take a later bus to work. I hate dealing with crowded buses and traffic jams on 520. This morning, though, I was up early and decided to just head in.
As I expected, the bus was crowded. I felt lucky to find a seat in the back row, though, where we sat leg-to-leg, 5 across. Listening to NPR on my sanDisk, I was riding in my own little world, looking out at the birds on Lake Washington, oblivious to those around me. Commuting is weird like that: 100 people on a bus, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, each in a little bubble of existence; earbuds firmly in place, nose buried in a book, traveling in their own customized version of Life.
Then, I see her.
She was sitting in the seat just behind the rear door, the seat with the plexiglass in front of it that shields the rider from the wind and rain that invariably seems to leak through the cracks in the door. The plexiglass also acts as a mirror, if something dark is in front of it, like someone wearing a brown jacket. Like today.
Soft, rounded cheeks, eyes darting back and forth as they stared out the window, lips curling every now and then into a gentle smile. I wondered what she was smiling about. She's one of the few with no earbuds, no book open; she's riding along, taking in life, or caught up in her daydreams or memories. Apparently she doesn't need outside assistance to customize her commute.
"Wow," I thought almost out loud, "she's gorgeous." I wonder why I had not seen her before. Sure, there are lots of commuters, but Seattle is a small enough city that you start recognizing people around town. Especially on the commute to the Eastside, and especially attractive women. I know I hadn't seen her before, but I was immediately captivated. More so than I usually am when my gaze can't seem to wander away from a gorgeous woman. There's something about her, something ethereal and mysterious, that though I can't put my finger on it; it's there, it's visceral, and it's god damned enthralling!
I stared for another few minutes. I was fascinated. Her expressions kept changing; she's got something major going through her mind. I want in.
All of the sudden, she stared forward, into the plexiglass mirror, and looked right at me. Jolts of electricity shot through my heart and my head. I looked away, but couldn't help but look back from time to time throughout the rest of the commute. And she seemed to do the same thing. Was she catching me looking at her, wondering who that freak in the back of the bus is? Or was she feeling excited and nervous like me, thinking that I was catching her staring at me?
When the bus stopped, the long line of Microsofties filed out the front of the bus. She got off ahead of me, and walked the opposite direction I was going. When I got off, I moved out of the way of others exiting, leaned against the bus shelter, and just gazed towards her. When she looked over her shoulder, I waved and gave a little "hello" smile. She grinned, and walked back towards me.
"What's the deal?" she said as she came up to me.
"Sorry, I know this stuff only happens in Hollywood, but your eyes sent sparks through me. I've only met a couple women who have done that to me, and they turned out to be very important in my life."
She smiled, and reached out her hand. "I'm Allison," she said
As I expected, the bus was crowded. I felt lucky to find a seat in the back row, though, where we sat leg-to-leg, 5 across. Listening to NPR on my sanDisk, I was riding in my own little world, looking out at the birds on Lake Washington, oblivious to those around me. Commuting is weird like that: 100 people on a bus, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, each in a little bubble of existence; earbuds firmly in place, nose buried in a book, traveling in their own customized version of Life.
Then, I see her.
She was sitting in the seat just behind the rear door, the seat with the plexiglass in front of it that shields the rider from the wind and rain that invariably seems to leak through the cracks in the door. The plexiglass also acts as a mirror, if something dark is in front of it, like someone wearing a brown jacket. Like today.
Soft, rounded cheeks, eyes darting back and forth as they stared out the window, lips curling every now and then into a gentle smile. I wondered what she was smiling about. She's one of the few with no earbuds, no book open; she's riding along, taking in life, or caught up in her daydreams or memories. Apparently she doesn't need outside assistance to customize her commute.
"Wow," I thought almost out loud, "she's gorgeous." I wonder why I had not seen her before. Sure, there are lots of commuters, but Seattle is a small enough city that you start recognizing people around town. Especially on the commute to the Eastside, and especially attractive women. I know I hadn't seen her before, but I was immediately captivated. More so than I usually am when my gaze can't seem to wander away from a gorgeous woman. There's something about her, something ethereal and mysterious, that though I can't put my finger on it; it's there, it's visceral, and it's god damned enthralling!
I stared for another few minutes. I was fascinated. Her expressions kept changing; she's got something major going through her mind. I want in.
All of the sudden, she stared forward, into the plexiglass mirror, and looked right at me. Jolts of electricity shot through my heart and my head. I looked away, but couldn't help but look back from time to time throughout the rest of the commute. And she seemed to do the same thing. Was she catching me looking at her, wondering who that freak in the back of the bus is? Or was she feeling excited and nervous like me, thinking that I was catching her staring at me?
When the bus stopped, the long line of Microsofties filed out the front of the bus. She got off ahead of me, and walked the opposite direction I was going. When I got off, I moved out of the way of others exiting, leaned against the bus shelter, and just gazed towards her. When she looked over her shoulder, I waved and gave a little "hello" smile. She grinned, and walked back towards me.
"What's the deal?" she said as she came up to me.
"Sorry, I know this stuff only happens in Hollywood, but your eyes sent sparks through me. I've only met a couple women who have done that to me, and they turned out to be very important in my life."
She smiled, and reached out her hand. "I'm Allison," she said
sick
I have to start trusting my instincts!!
Freeroll on UB, top 50 get a "TEC" (tournament entry chip, I think)... 1700 start, down to 800 in the first 12 minutes!! 1st hand played I got the nut flush, the river paired the board, and I fought my urge to raise the pot-sized bet from the BB. I called, and took the pot, but I was doing what I am striving to do: tight, aggressive, carefully-thought-out poker. No need to bust out this early. Last freeroll I paid close attention to was a Poker After Dark on tilt, 400 starters, and I took 5th (which got me nothing, but still...). This one was shaping up just like that: everyone pushing stupidly, marginal hands pushing and getting crushed by patient players waiting for Monsters. That was my strategy (patiently waiting), and it worked to perfection....mostly....
Another few rounds of hands are a blur, but I had pushed my 1500 up to close to 3000, when this hand takes place... in the BB with AA. UTG goes all in for ~2200, called by the big stack at the table (10K), folds to the cut off who almost calls (or is just slow with the mouse), and I of course PUSH here, fully expecting the big stack to call the extra 800 or whatever... UTG pushed with K2o, big stack pushed with KJ. Board is 7J7x7. I triple up.
Another few round later, blinds 20/40, I'm sitting around with around 8300, I wake up to KK in MP. Some limpers, and I pop it to 250. Cut-off min-raises. SB calls, guy to my right calls, I pop it again to 1.5K, trying to isolate here... all 3 call. "Woops!" I'm thinking, and say out loud to myself: "One of these guys might actually have aces." Would be hard to believe, as the only quality hand I've seen shove this deep so far was QQ. But I remind myself that I've got to be careful here, as my kings won't always hold up against 3 opponents. I also tell myself that an ace on the flop, and I'm done with this hand.
Flop comes J high, all spades... and I'm not holding one. Checked to me, so I bet.... and what do I bet?
I bet it all. I'm all in.
Gee, brilliant move. On an all-spade flop, not holding one spade, and still to act is the one stack that had me covered by almost 2-1 before the hand started, I decide to push and put my tournament life at risk, with an M that's over 100, I decide to put it all at risk.
And what does he do? Calls.
And what does he call with? As Jc.
And what does the river bring? A spade.
I almost resisted the urge to push there. Almost, though, doesn't cut it. At the beginning of the hand, I knew that I should proceed with caution. But I didn't. On a terrifying board for my hand, I pushed. And I got drawn out on.
That hand was not one that I had to go broke with. We're only in the 4th blind round; 500 runners left, and I've got a stack roughly 1.5 x's the average stack. I've still got SO much play left! Yes, I had Kings. KINGS! And I shoved on a scary board. I could have played this SO many other ways...
here's a couple:
1
smooth call the reraise preflop. Bet the flop - about 1.5K (leaves me with 6300 back) ; if I'm raised - fold. I don't have a spade, and I don't need to go broke here -- no guarantee of course I'll go broke, but my cowboys became quite vulnerable to that flop. On the turn & river check / fold (OK to call a small bet as we may be good if there's no ace out there, but anything more than 1/5 the pot will be a fold.
2
smooth call the reraise preflop. Check the flop; if it's checked, then shove the turn - unless it's another spade or an ace.
Biggest mistake, after thinking about this? Well, OK, shoving that flop was the biggest mistake, but my 2nd biggest mistake was the preflop reraise. I built a pot I felt like I couldn't get away from. I should have realized I was going to get all 3 callers with my bet - sad to say, but it wasn't big enough to be scary. My only other option that I could think of, would have been to shove preflop. I mean, I don't think that the big stack would have laid it down, so I still would have busted, but I would have been much happier about my play.
Gotta control myself!
Freeroll on UB, top 50 get a "TEC" (tournament entry chip, I think)... 1700 start, down to 800 in the first 12 minutes!! 1st hand played I got the nut flush, the river paired the board, and I fought my urge to raise the pot-sized bet from the BB. I called, and took the pot, but I was doing what I am striving to do: tight, aggressive, carefully-thought-out poker. No need to bust out this early. Last freeroll I paid close attention to was a Poker After Dark on tilt, 400 starters, and I took 5th (which got me nothing, but still...). This one was shaping up just like that: everyone pushing stupidly, marginal hands pushing and getting crushed by patient players waiting for Monsters. That was my strategy (patiently waiting), and it worked to perfection....mostly....
Another few rounds of hands are a blur, but I had pushed my 1500 up to close to 3000, when this hand takes place... in the BB with AA. UTG goes all in for ~2200, called by the big stack at the table (10K), folds to the cut off who almost calls (or is just slow with the mouse), and I of course PUSH here, fully expecting the big stack to call the extra 800 or whatever... UTG pushed with K2o, big stack pushed with KJ. Board is 7J7x7. I triple up.
Another few round later, blinds 20/40, I'm sitting around with around 8300, I wake up to KK in MP. Some limpers, and I pop it to 250. Cut-off min-raises. SB calls, guy to my right calls, I pop it again to 1.5K, trying to isolate here... all 3 call. "Woops!" I'm thinking, and say out loud to myself: "One of these guys might actually have aces." Would be hard to believe, as the only quality hand I've seen shove this deep so far was QQ. But I remind myself that I've got to be careful here, as my kings won't always hold up against 3 opponents. I also tell myself that an ace on the flop, and I'm done with this hand.
Flop comes J high, all spades... and I'm not holding one. Checked to me, so I bet.... and what do I bet?
I bet it all. I'm all in.
Gee, brilliant move. On an all-spade flop, not holding one spade, and still to act is the one stack that had me covered by almost 2-1 before the hand started, I decide to push and put my tournament life at risk, with an M that's over 100, I decide to put it all at risk.
And what does he do? Calls.
And what does he call with? As Jc.
And what does the river bring? A spade.
I almost resisted the urge to push there. Almost, though, doesn't cut it. At the beginning of the hand, I knew that I should proceed with caution. But I didn't. On a terrifying board for my hand, I pushed. And I got drawn out on.
That hand was not one that I had to go broke with. We're only in the 4th blind round; 500 runners left, and I've got a stack roughly 1.5 x's the average stack. I've still got SO much play left! Yes, I had Kings. KINGS! And I shoved on a scary board. I could have played this SO many other ways...
here's a couple:
1
smooth call the reraise preflop. Bet the flop - about 1.5K (leaves me with 6300 back) ; if I'm raised - fold. I don't have a spade, and I don't need to go broke here -- no guarantee of course I'll go broke, but my cowboys became quite vulnerable to that flop. On the turn & river check / fold (OK to call a small bet as we may be good if there's no ace out there, but anything more than 1/5 the pot will be a fold.
2
smooth call the reraise preflop. Check the flop; if it's checked, then shove the turn - unless it's another spade or an ace.
Biggest mistake, after thinking about this? Well, OK, shoving that flop was the biggest mistake, but my 2nd biggest mistake was the preflop reraise. I built a pot I felt like I couldn't get away from. I should have realized I was going to get all 3 callers with my bet - sad to say, but it wasn't big enough to be scary. My only other option that I could think of, would have been to shove preflop. I mean, I don't think that the big stack would have laid it down, so I still would have busted, but I would have been much happier about my play.
Gotta control myself!
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
the Actor
Damn Full Tilt for having technical difficulties!!
Fair warning: barely any poker content here... just big Life questions, and crap that goes through my head all the time...
to quote a Very Important Book (well, text is changed by personalizing):
"More than most people, I lead a double life. I am very much the actor. To the outer world I present my stage character. This is the one I like my fellows to see. I want to enjoy a certain reputation...."
That sums up a big chunk of my life, I'm sorry to say. For most of my life, I haven't really lived being honest with myself (and with the rest of the world). I have all too often tried to create an image of myself in others' eyes that is not the truth, but rather what I want others to think is the truth about who I am. I try to act more cool, more intelligent, more stable, more -- I dunno, more of however it is I think will make me look "better" in your eyes.
Sad, huh? I was about to write there have been chunks of my life where this wasn't the case, but just as I was about to write about two specific periods of my life where I felt I was living as much at the heart of Who I Am as I could, I immediately recalled why that would have been a big lie.
Why is this? I don't know. And I'll be honest, moving over to the left coast has, in a way, given me at least a partial clean slate. I've kept much to myself since moving out here; sure I've met some people, and when I was going to the casinos 3-4 times / week I was beginning to make some connections too... I'll tell ya what -- the times I have been most "at ease" with myself, I have been in a casino, sitting at a poker table, or taking a break and talking to somebody about a hand, or poker in general. I'm very comfortable in that environment. I met a lot of asswipes there, too, but there were others who loved to play and talk and read about poker like I do.
At work? I'm lost. I majored in theatre arts in college, I acted and directed in plays, I played bongos in a hippie band, I designed & ran lights for a major label rock band, and I just kinda fell into the computer world. And where I work these people have a language all their own... smart people, but with so much more technical knowledge and experience than I have that I feel like an outsider, almost an intruder into some other world.
At play? Play for me is low-key, and often solitary. Yet even when I'm by myself, I feel like I want to somehow make sure that everyone who sees me when I'm out to dinner by myself, or at the movies by myself, realizes that I'm OK with that. I DO honestly love being by myself, and doing things by myself. But why do I think anyone even pays attention to the fact that I'm there, let alone CARE if they think anything of me?!
And then there's the other part of my life, where I spend a lot of time with similarly-spiritually minded people. Even in the one specific group I spend a big chunk of that time with, I don't feel like "me." I feel somehow that they must know more than I do; I get nervous when it's my turn to speak in front of the group (and only that group), and my face turns a horrid shade of red (I haven't seen it, I just feel it, and let me tell you - it's gotta be hideous!), and the connection typically made between my brain and my mouth breaks down... I feel like an outsider.
Hell, I'll be honest - I feel like an outsider in Life. Been the case for most of my life. And I know that that can be changed. Question is: am I willing to change?
I'm not writing this for pity, or for anyone to say "don't be silly" (yes, it does feel silly - please don't remind me). I know I'm not the only one in the world who goes through this (or has gone through this). I'm not afraid or ashamed of who I am or what I go through. In all honesty, I don't know why I'm writing this. Just to get it out? Maybe... I'll tell ya this, though -- this blog, as a whole, has been the Real Me. Not the Actor Me. I hope to keep it that way, and strive to meld this same "realness" into the "real world."
Fair warning: barely any poker content here... just big Life questions, and crap that goes through my head all the time...
to quote a Very Important Book (well, text is changed by personalizing):
"More than most people, I lead a double life. I am very much the actor. To the outer world I present my stage character. This is the one I like my fellows to see. I want to enjoy a certain reputation...."
That sums up a big chunk of my life, I'm sorry to say. For most of my life, I haven't really lived being honest with myself (and with the rest of the world). I have all too often tried to create an image of myself in others' eyes that is not the truth, but rather what I want others to think is the truth about who I am. I try to act more cool, more intelligent, more stable, more -- I dunno, more of however it is I think will make me look "better" in your eyes.
Sad, huh? I was about to write there have been chunks of my life where this wasn't the case, but just as I was about to write about two specific periods of my life where I felt I was living as much at the heart of Who I Am as I could, I immediately recalled why that would have been a big lie.
Why is this? I don't know. And I'll be honest, moving over to the left coast has, in a way, given me at least a partial clean slate. I've kept much to myself since moving out here; sure I've met some people, and when I was going to the casinos 3-4 times / week I was beginning to make some connections too... I'll tell ya what -- the times I have been most "at ease" with myself, I have been in a casino, sitting at a poker table, or taking a break and talking to somebody about a hand, or poker in general. I'm very comfortable in that environment. I met a lot of asswipes there, too, but there were others who loved to play and talk and read about poker like I do.
At work? I'm lost. I majored in theatre arts in college, I acted and directed in plays, I played bongos in a hippie band, I designed & ran lights for a major label rock band, and I just kinda fell into the computer world. And where I work these people have a language all their own... smart people, but with so much more technical knowledge and experience than I have that I feel like an outsider, almost an intruder into some other world.
At play? Play for me is low-key, and often solitary. Yet even when I'm by myself, I feel like I want to somehow make sure that everyone who sees me when I'm out to dinner by myself, or at the movies by myself, realizes that I'm OK with that. I DO honestly love being by myself, and doing things by myself. But why do I think anyone even pays attention to the fact that I'm there, let alone CARE if they think anything of me?!
And then there's the other part of my life, where I spend a lot of time with similarly-spiritually minded people. Even in the one specific group I spend a big chunk of that time with, I don't feel like "me." I feel somehow that they must know more than I do; I get nervous when it's my turn to speak in front of the group (and only that group), and my face turns a horrid shade of red (I haven't seen it, I just feel it, and let me tell you - it's gotta be hideous!), and the connection typically made between my brain and my mouth breaks down... I feel like an outsider.
Hell, I'll be honest - I feel like an outsider in Life. Been the case for most of my life. And I know that that can be changed. Question is: am I willing to change?
I'm not writing this for pity, or for anyone to say "don't be silly" (yes, it does feel silly - please don't remind me). I know I'm not the only one in the world who goes through this (or has gone through this). I'm not afraid or ashamed of who I am or what I go through. In all honesty, I don't know why I'm writing this. Just to get it out? Maybe... I'll tell ya this, though -- this blog, as a whole, has been the Real Me. Not the Actor Me. I hope to keep it that way, and strive to meld this same "realness" into the "real world."
late night stt
Last night's stt at tilt took 90 minutes to complete; 2nd hand into heads-up I bust. Tonight it took 75 minutes; heads-up went a little bit longer, but only b/c we gave each other walks like 5 hands in a row (I know, I know - that's the worst thing to do in HU - he was so short though that he was gonna push just about anything, so I had to wait 'till I got at least something resembling a decent hand!) - annnndddd......
And why am I showing you the results of a 5.50 stt? Well, I'm glad you asked!
Because I won. Yes, I was on the winning side of one race (my 88 beat AK), and doubled up on the very first hand when my 22 from the sb hit a set on the flop ( 2Q9 ), opponent checked behind on the turn ( j ), and re-re-raise-pushed when the river paired the J. What did he push with? Top pair NO KICKER! Q-6! Yes, I did hesitate before re-raising, and also hesitated before calling the push. Why? After he raised, I thought there was a chance he had QJ. When he pushed, I still had ~1K back, so I'd still be fine - but then I realized that that's not being careful, that's being a PUSSY.
I'm not trying to show off; there are plenty of you out there who win these all the time, and much bigger ones too. But this is where I'm at right now, and I've been struggling. And through it all I was still able to pull off a win. It all comes down to a different frame of mind. I don't have to instacall anything (though it IS a fun word to say!)... I can take my time, if I don't have the nuts. It's OK to stop and consider; matter of fact it's good. At this stage of my little poker life, this was an important win, especially combined with last night's 2nd place.
ALSO: I stopped surfing the 'net while playing. Awful habit I got into. I caught myself about to check the weather after the first couple blind rounds, and immediately closed the browser, and focused. Focus is good. And, especially how I feel I've been running, and especially since I feel I've let some leaks slip into my game, I NEED to focus. Yes, even in a $5.50 stt. Actually, especially a $5.50 stt: if I can focus when that little $ is on the line, then when I'm sitting with $300 in front of me in Vegas in a few weeks, I'll already be ready. I'm not playing to make serious money, I'm playing for fun, and for practice for the bigger buy-in tourny's I will play. But if I treat every game with the same focus / intensity, then I can only stand to improve. And that's a Good Thing (tm).
That "maybe I suck" post was a revelation for myself. I considered deleting it, but it's honestly a good reminder to myself. I think two things were happening: 1) running really badly, and 2) allowing myself to make a ton of mistakes.
In upcoming posts I'm going to spell out my poker goals for the remainder of the year. But I can tell you one goal for sure: play mistake-free poker. Yes, an unreachable goal, but that's fine: when asked about meditation the Dalai Lama said that he strives to attain perfect enlightenment while meditating. He also said that it is almost certainly an unattainable goal, but by shooting for it all he knows he'll reach as high as he can. Same with mistake-free poker.
But anyway..... it's late and time for bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about the dream I had last night (and yes, I may finally get into the "more than just poker" thing :) ).
And why am I showing you the results of a 5.50 stt? Well, I'm glad you asked!
Because I won. Yes, I was on the winning side of one race (my 88 beat AK), and doubled up on the very first hand when my 22 from the sb hit a set on the flop ( 2Q9 ), opponent checked behind on the turn ( j ), and re-re-raise-pushed when the river paired the J. What did he push with? Top pair NO KICKER! Q-6! Yes, I did hesitate before re-raising, and also hesitated before calling the push. Why? After he raised, I thought there was a chance he had QJ. When he pushed, I still had ~1K back, so I'd still be fine - but then I realized that that's not being careful, that's being a PUSSY.
I'm not trying to show off; there are plenty of you out there who win these all the time, and much bigger ones too. But this is where I'm at right now, and I've been struggling. And through it all I was still able to pull off a win. It all comes down to a different frame of mind. I don't have to instacall anything (though it IS a fun word to say!)... I can take my time, if I don't have the nuts. It's OK to stop and consider; matter of fact it's good. At this stage of my little poker life, this was an important win, especially combined with last night's 2nd place.
ALSO: I stopped surfing the 'net while playing. Awful habit I got into. I caught myself about to check the weather after the first couple blind rounds, and immediately closed the browser, and focused. Focus is good. And, especially how I feel I've been running, and especially since I feel I've let some leaks slip into my game, I NEED to focus. Yes, even in a $5.50 stt. Actually, especially a $5.50 stt: if I can focus when that little $ is on the line, then when I'm sitting with $300 in front of me in Vegas in a few weeks, I'll already be ready. I'm not playing to make serious money, I'm playing for fun, and for practice for the bigger buy-in tourny's I will play. But if I treat every game with the same focus / intensity, then I can only stand to improve. And that's a Good Thing (tm).
That "maybe I suck" post was a revelation for myself. I considered deleting it, but it's honestly a good reminder to myself. I think two things were happening: 1) running really badly, and 2) allowing myself to make a ton of mistakes.
In upcoming posts I'm going to spell out my poker goals for the remainder of the year. But I can tell you one goal for sure: play mistake-free poker. Yes, an unreachable goal, but that's fine: when asked about meditation the Dalai Lama said that he strives to attain perfect enlightenment while meditating. He also said that it is almost certainly an unattainable goal, but by shooting for it all he knows he'll reach as high as he can. Same with mistake-free poker.
But anyway..... it's late and time for bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about the dream I had last night (and yes, I may finally get into the "more than just poker" thing :) ).
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