Sunday, June 15, 2008

poker & emotions

One thing I'm realizing is that I do not emotionally deal well with big swings. Oh sure, the up swings are wonderful, but the down swings -- I'm not good with them.

I start to question my abilities. I start to wonder whether I really am any good at this game, or if I just get lucky during winning sessions. Knowing that the majority of poker players are losing players, I wondered whether this fit me too, and if my stats for the past 9-10 months or so (only began tracking live NL play, leaving limit out right now) are just an anomaly.

About a month ago, I had an incredible poker weekend - 2 marathon poker sessions that netted me over $1K. At $1/$2. I kid you not.

But then the next 3 weekends were horrid. Awful. I ended up below where I was before memorial day.

This weekend, though, I did 2 back to back sessions Sat-Sun morning, and had to buy in 3 times to the $1/$2 game to end with a $24 profit. And the $2-$40 spread game I went to I crushed: started with $100, walked out with $460.

I hated that I spent 14 hours playing to only show a $24 profit. That almost feels like a loss...

The fact of the matter is that when I start losing, I start to feel bad about myself, and start questioning my play and my abilities. And when I'm winning, I start to wonder how this game can be so easy, and whether I should step up to $3/$5 even though I'm not properly bankrolled for that level.

I know neither of these two thoughts is correct. Yet my brain still goes there. So I guess part of me believes these thoughts. The brain lying to itself is a scary thing.

Logically, I understand 100% that you can't have winning sessions every time: nobody does except the UP and AP Super User accounts. But psychologically I get way too down on myself after losing sessions.

First step in any problem is to acknowledge the problem, so I'm part way there at least :)

1 comment:

Riggstad said...

KEEP EMOTION OUT OF IT!!!

you don't play enough to combat the variance, so you have to take your results period over a much longer time frame.

Its not 30-60 days with the amount you play, its 12 months...

track that, and see how you feel

Remember that most cash players will have more losing sessions than winning sessions, but they will also win a ton more during those winning sessions, than lose during the losing sessions...

So says the late great chip reese

You can play this game. Don't get all jammed up over short term results, whether they are good or bad.