late night stt

Last night's stt at tilt took 90 minutes to complete; 2nd hand into heads-up I bust. Tonight it took 75 minutes; heads-up went a little bit longer, but only b/c we gave each other walks like 5 hands in a row (I know, I know - that's the worst thing to do in HU - he was so short though that he was gonna push just about anything, so I had to wait 'till I got at least something resembling a decent hand!) - annnndddd......


And why am I showing you the results of a 5.50 stt? Well, I'm glad you asked!

Because I won. Yes, I was on the winning side of one race (my 88 beat AK), and doubled up on the very first hand when my 22 from the sb hit a set on the flop ( 2Q9 ), opponent checked behind on the turn ( j ), and re-re-raise-pushed when the river paired the J. What did he push with? Top pair NO KICKER! Q-6! Yes, I did hesitate before re-raising, and also hesitated before calling the push. Why? After he raised, I thought there was a chance he had QJ. When he pushed, I still had ~1K back, so I'd still be fine - but then I realized that that's not being careful, that's being a PUSSY.

I'm not trying to show off; there are plenty of you out there who win these all the time, and much bigger ones too. But this is where I'm at right now, and I've been struggling. And through it all I was still able to pull off a win. It all comes down to a different frame of mind. I don't have to instacall anything (though it IS a fun word to say!)... I can take my time, if I don't have the nuts. It's OK to stop and consider; matter of fact it's good. At this stage of my little poker life, this was an important win, especially combined with last night's 2nd place.

ALSO: I stopped surfing the 'net while playing. Awful habit I got into. I caught myself about to check the weather after the first couple blind rounds, and immediately closed the browser, and focused. Focus is good. And, especially how I feel I've been running, and especially since I feel I've let some leaks slip into my game, I NEED to focus. Yes, even in a $5.50 stt. Actually, especially a $5.50 stt: if I can focus when that little $ is on the line, then when I'm sitting with $300 in front of me in Vegas in a few weeks, I'll already be ready. I'm not playing to make serious money, I'm playing for fun, and for practice for the bigger buy-in tourny's I will play. But if I treat every game with the same focus / intensity, then I can only stand to improve. And that's a Good Thing (tm).

That "maybe I suck" post was a revelation for myself. I considered deleting it, but it's honestly a good reminder to myself. I think two things were happening: 1) running really badly, and 2) allowing myself to make a ton of mistakes.

In upcoming posts I'm going to spell out my poker goals for the remainder of the year. But I can tell you one goal for sure: play mistake-free poker. Yes, an unreachable goal, but that's fine: when asked about meditation the Dalai Lama said that he strives to attain perfect enlightenment while meditating. He also said that it is almost certainly an unattainable goal, but by shooting for it all he knows he'll reach as high as he can. Same with mistake-free poker.

But anyway..... it's late and time for bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you about the dream I had last night (and yes, I may finally get into the "more than just poker" thing :) ).